August 22, 2016

Feel the chill... the empty void without bike porn... Burlington

Following an amazing show in Boston, Bike Smut is getting ready to press on to the rest of the lucky parts of New England, Canada, the Rust Belt and Great Lakes. First up Burlington, Vermont!

We are fortunate the amazing venue, Arts Riot has played host to Bike Smut for the past 3 years. They have the space and equipment to make a show that lights a fire under the mostly mild-mannered butts of Vermont's capital city. Plus we have some really exciting local artists who are making some excellent live performance too!

the first time we blended enthuistically

Featuring: Songbird, Lauren Lauren Larken and Dj Beet Pilgrim, Steve Scuderi

This little blurb is a big part of why we are so excited Larken is partnering up with Bike Smut... again:
Larken creates art campaigns that initiate crucial dialog about gender issues and community building. As a founder of HollabackNYC and Radical Performance Group, she has designed, created, and performed on behalf of community groups such as The Alliance Against Sexual Assault, Times UP!, and Freegan Info. Intended to supplement her Danish Fulbright application, this short piece shows her using an interactive artistic approach to complex social issues, making activism fun, free and sexy.

Plus one of the best writers that ever published an article that right is now working at the local weekly, 7 Days, which we assume will have people dancing in the streets!

blame this photo on Times Up, NYC

Get your advance tickets now and save 30% off the door!

Bike Smut 9: Science Friction
Thursday, Aug 25
Arts Riot - 400 Pine St
7:30 Doors
8:00 Show
$6 presale | $9 Day of
With Live Performance


So how much do we love New England? A BurlingTON!


August 1, 2016

Bikesexual Boston: The End is Neigh

It is fitting that our final US/Canadian tour begins in the original cultural capitol of the United States. Boston has seen Bike Smut at its dazzling highs and depressing lows.

Along the way we have been blessed to have excellent help. Igniting the bikesexual revolution was a pair of local bicycle-fun activists we had met in Portland, Sara and Jamie.  Jamie would help connect the dots in various cities as she traveled the world; Sara would go on to organize Boston's World Naked Bike Ride and provided much needed comforts that are so rare when on the road.

The gender-queer dynamo, Aliza of Truth provided unparalleled marketing power. We sold out The Brattle Theater on our very first screening! Richard Meek and a photographer Derek Kouyoumjian from The Boston Phoenix promoted and documented the extraordinary presentation of "Bike Smut 3: Cycle Bound" Ending with a live song and dance performance parody of Dirty Dancing's "The BikePorn of My Life" with a 3-person, full-Monty burlesque and stirringly infectious sing along at the end.

Whew. Hard act to follow.

That was 6 years ago, and a lot has changed. Touring with a team of radical queers is both as exhilarating and painful as it sounds. Then we learned our promotional powerhose Aliza had suffered a major accident that would leave her brain hemorrhaging and needing multiple surgeries to save her life. They survived but the damage had been done. The torrent of words that had once flowed from Aliza with such speed and clarity were severely debilitated. Truth Serum and the community of people who depended on it to provide access to quality gender-bending art were in limbo.

After trying for many years to recapture the magic without Aliz'a help Bike Smut had to rebuild.  Rev.Phil decided to bike tour with Bike Smut as a challenge to see if he could "walk the walk." He bike toured across AND around North America, presenting Bike Smut 7: The Porny Express in dozens of cities, riding thousands of miles from Minneapolis to Montreal to Mexico with all the necessary gear that used to fill a van.

Bike Smut found a comfort in more intimate venues. Teaming up with a tall glass of smart water, the typically-Boston-brilliant, bike punk, Q helped us secure and fill an underground venue space. It was packed with our fav kind of audience, curious and vocal perverts! They had excellent questions making an engaging Q and A session followed by a strip down naked-style dance party!  It was supremely rewarding to have some of our favorite organizers and filmmakers at that show, especially because we had worked hard on promoting Bike Smut and we all want it to fulfill that potential promise of being the catalyst for joyous celebration of our liberty and sexuality in motion. It was no small feet for Aliza to get up the 7 flights of stairs nor stick it out to the end as such an engaging show can be overwhelmingly taxing even to healthy grey matter. Brain damage is a real thing and healing from it takes a lot of patient work. We are exceedingly grateful to the community of people who have and continue to support Aliza. Thank you!

Last year we were delighted to find Aliza was starting to organize events again, this time creating space for people to create their own art while challenging taboos at Dr Sketchy's! Sara and Rev.Phil took the opportunity to be models for Dr Sketchy before the screening of Bike Smut 8: Come Again. More exciting performances and a rapt audience. More photos from Aliza.

Which brings us to today. This week we will present Bike Smut 9: Science Friction, our final screening in Boston. We have a series of movies and performances based on the theme including: interracial alien orgies, power-tool wielding lesbians, Mexican post-porn saddle squirting, polybikesexual queer trans babes armed with dildo flamethrowers, hunting for a mate in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, and time traveling sex missionaries!

But before that we have a special event where Reverend Phil will make a rare powerpoint presentation called:


Its gonna be amazing!

Both events are hosted at Aeronaut Brewing Company  at 14 Tyler Street Somerville, MA

Wednesday, Aug 3rd
5pm bike workshop with SHIFT bike collective
6:30 Ken Smith of Rejjee explores safe, consensual BDSM with your bike by locking it up in public
7:15pm Bikesexual Revelations
FB event

Sunday, August 7
8:15pm, Adults Only, $9 donation
Live Performances
FB event

Following this event we have screenings in New Haven, Troy, Burlington, White River Junction, Montreal, Toronto, Buffalo, Pittsburgh, Detroit, Peoria, Chicago, Milwaukee, Madison, and Minneapolis. Please connect us with other people along the way!

We need help finding people and venues in other New England towns. Help Providence, Northampton and Portland, Maine discover their bikesexuality!

Pics from Bike Smut 3: Cycle Bound by Derek Kouyoumjian, Tom Meek and The Boston Phoenix

July 14, 2016

The Final Tiny Sausage Fest... in Vienna!

This Thursday we share our amazing program in Vienna, with Miss Poppy Cox!
July 14th
Bike Kitchen
goldschlagstrasse 8, 1150 Wien
8pm,  5 euros suggested donation
With special guest performances 

July 8, 2016

WNBR is back in the Buff

Get those bikes rolling smooth its time to Ride naked! Again!

Buffalo hosts its 2nd ever World Naked Bike Ride! 
Saturday, July 9th at 7pm at the corner North and Franklin

The ride is "as bare as you dare" so even the timid are encouraged to join the ride in support. There is no worry about being naked enough. However many started the ride fully dressed then because they saw so many naked people having such a good time have felt the urge to strip off more and more clothes as they ride. It is likely that you may be wearing something (if you want) but you wont be alone. Naked Rides attract dozens if not hundreds (or in the case of Portland and Chicago, thousands) of riders! Many silly prudes react in shock and horror as they exclaim, "but what if i have a problem with the seat? What if I hit a bump?" as if your naked body will somehow engulf the entire saddle and you will be stuck like that forever as some sort of bike-human-hybrid. (A version of that story has already been written but feel free to make that into a short movie if you like.) How absurd! Do you really think a thin piece of fabric is the only thing keeping your saddle from becoming a dildo? Pashaw!

Riding naked feels great! As the sun, wind and even rain kiss our bare skin we are reminded of our humanity. The WNBR is a rare treat because our patriarchal expectations that prohibit mothers from breast feeding their babies have put such an impossible standards on all of us that many never want to go outside, much less expose our skin. But there is nothing "natural" about clothes.

Even with the vast amount of body shame and terror at being vulnerable on our streets the World Naked Bike Ride (WNBR) is a wildly popular event. Even the local Buffalo newspaper couldn't help but promote it  Although some want to ride completely nude we encourage comfortable footwear and maybe a fannypack or bag you can attach to your handlebars for your essentials.

Its a protest against body shame and car culture. Riding is a great way to bring visibility to a cause so start thinking about what slogans you might want to share.

Body painting may be available, but coming pre-decorated is recommended. A full body painting takes a while to apply, so plan accordingly. Also there is a really fun afterparty planned so be ready for that!

You may also want to decorate your bike. Its a great way to show the connection between you and your mobility. You move together and you play together and you trust your very survival on its steadfast reliability. You both deserve to look great!

Easy there, its not just about bikes. Any human powered people are welcome to attend. Rollerblade, skateboards, shopping carts or just joggers! It a celebration of our bodies and our streets!

Can't ride but want to support? Spectators are encouraged to congregate at the intersection of Bidwell Parkway and Elmwood Avenue around 8 p.m. Get more info by putting your nose in their FaceCrack, er... ButtBook, uh FB

photo cred to

June 9, 2016

World Naked Bike Ride, Las Vegas, Baby!

Its naked bike ride season! Get your bewbs and your butts and your bodies ready to ride!

We have been covering and uncovering the World Naked Bike Ride since our inception in 2007. The future of Bike Smut is still unknown but we are confident the ideals inherent to biking naked will carry on!

This weekend for the first time ever the denizens of the City of Sin are encouraged to bare their bodies to the reality of modern living which include (but are not limited to):
  • Shame and ridicule for having bodies that are not up to Hollywood standards
  • Exposure to auto emissions
  • Sunburns
  • Traffic
  • Seeing others naked bodies
  • Others seeing your naked body
  • Fun times

Its an odd thing but when enough people gather together to do something that would normally be dangerous or even off-putting, it suddenly becomes acceptable... even patriotic! Such is the nature of  community standards. If the community decides that it doesn’t find nudity offensive then its not offensive. Shall we just blindly inherent our sense of morals from our fore-bearers, who inherited theirs from some stuffy Victorian sense of puritanical propriety? NAY! We must proudly examine our taboos with great trepidation (and a pinch of zeal) so as to avoid continuing lame traditions that at best may have suited a community for its time but were never meant to be carried on so long and at worse should never have been considered in the first place.

The Erotic Museum has made a pledge to help protect our individual right to explore sexuality freely and without shame or coercion. So the "Bare As You Dare" idea of the World Naked Bike Ride fits in perfectly. This idea has not escaped our local media. Rosalie Spear of the Las Vegas Weekly made it their front page story this week:
In our society, the human body is highly sexualized, and its public baring is usually deemed a criminal offense.  The World Naked Bike Ride already occurs annually in more than 75 cities in over 20 countries. This peaceful political protest celebrates our natural form in a non-sexual manner while calling attention to the world’s dependence on fossil fuels. Riding nude suggests a dichotomy, between being vulnerable yet empowered.
That may be the most concise, intellectual way that idea has been expressed. Take a moment to imagine being a driver in a car and seeing many naked bikers. You likely would give them more room because, "I don't want to hit them, they are naked!" Yet you could pass every other biker without a second thought about their safety. As if clothes offered sufficient protection. A case study showed that drivers passed closer to cyclists wearing bike helmets, presumably because they were less concerned about hitting them so it stands to reason naked bikers would be even safer!

Moreover, Las Vegas may be the most difficult place to bike in North America. Having traveled across much of the country we can say with certainty that there are aspects that are absolutely brutal. Most major roads feel more like highways with more active traffic entering and exiting from all the businesses. They both often have 3,  4 or more lanes of travel and lights that are timed for travel at speeds that are near impossible for bikers to maintain. The neighborhood streets in between major arteries often result in dead ends leaving the unwary biker right where they started, only more dehydrated as the endless asphalt keeps the desert heat long into the night. This compounded with half the population visiting from elsewhere, being encouraged to drink and gamble all day and night with the comfort that what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.


Though all this we find a way. Like many bikers in other cities we learn techniques for mitigating risk. We ride in packs when possible. We learn safer routes and times but there are still a lot of people on the margins. People who haven't been riding long, or haven't thought to look for a different route. By building a stronger community we make it possible for us to organize and improve the conditions for everyone.

This is actually really important because this joyous parade is protected part of our freedom of expression. The people have the right to petition the Government for a redress of grievances. Say it proud what you think, or better yet, show up early and write your ideas on your skin. You know loads of people will be reading your thoughts (as long as its not too wordy).

This is a WORLD naked bike ride. It happens in dozens of places all over the world. We can help each other by letting people know where to join a naked ride in




Mexico City,


If you would like to host a ride of your own you can start it by adding your location to this ever expanding list of rides.

While at the museum ask to ride the world's largest sex bike 

Its no wonder that the WNBR and Bike Smut are such good friends. It is only with the autonomy of our own bodies independence that we can feel free to explore freely (or conversely, give up that freedom to a trusted dominant partner).

Its your body! Its your life! Expose it as you will without the burden of patriarchal norms that should have been phased out more than a century ago. Bring a friend and join us as we take to the streets in Las Vegas' First ever World Naked Bike Ride!

Saturday, June 11th
Erotic Museum
3275 Sammy Davis Jr Drive
6PM  Free food, Free beverages, vendors, bike mechanics, tabling, body painting and live DJ!

Please register here so we have enough goodies for everyone!

June 3, 2016

NYC Porn Film Fest!

A festival of Porn in New York City? Why yes, this weekend is the NYC Porn Film Festival!

JebusTits, there is so much porn in one room:
  • Bushwick Arts Festival
  • Ryan Sullivan’s ISLAND + panel discussion of barebacking in contemporary porn
  • Katie Rex & panel explores pornography in feminist culture/its positive affirmations in the lives of the performers & viewers
  • The Social Sex Revolution: Cindy Gallop and associates for 2 short talks and a screening of
  • Oskur Garcia presents: "Anthropocene" Anarchco-queer-porn curator from Berlin
  • AK Burns & A.L. Steiner's 69-minute sociosexual film about community

  • Porn as a tool to legitimize a visual aesthetic while transforming it into a categorized fetish
  • Mistress Dahlia Rain's introduction to financial domination

  • Dale Cooper presents PIRACY!
  • Bike Smut: Interracial alien orgies, power-tool wielding lesbians, Mexican post-porn saddle squirting
  • Antonio Onio's Loose Holes, A selection of shorts that examine how technology effects sex
  • Max Bernstein presents... Comedians talk about pornography.
  • Gerry Visco & Ron Jeremy present 'The Golden Age of Porn' Screening of the film: JOY + panel discussion

  • Daliah Saper presents Revenge Porn: high profile cases, discuss legal issues & the unstoppable streams of distribution.
  • Furrie Culture & Sex The subculture of Furry involves anthropomorphic animal characters

  • Alfred Bruyas presents "Unkempt" collected pornography by video artists united in their use of noise and mess.

There's some heavy hitters of the porn world in this lineup and Bike Smut is honored to be included among them. The issues of art and porn have, largely, been the issues of distribution.  Of the 16 different programs offered this weekend EIGHT of them are directly addressing this issue. 
We don't talk about it very often but Bike Smut has some challenging politics.

Most of the movies that are made for us are not distributed anywhere else. A few of our filmmakers are established pornographers but most at not.  For the kindergarten teachers and the military officers and the nonprofit directors and everyone else whose lives would be ruined if the wrong people saw them in a remotely sexual movie Bike Smut is a rare creative outlet of expression. 

We don't entrust these originally created pornographic films in the hands of just anyone, so we can't just mail copies of the program or send screeners to the media. There has to be a lot of trust and that trust is earned over many years, not given.
So we have to be there in person. But then its a pretty big bikesexual world. How can we be in all the places that ask us? We would like to be able to put our genitals where our mouths are but traveling everywhere by bicycle is difficult and time consuming (trust us, we rode 10k miles across North America and Europe for The Porny Express). We are left with the choice of flight. Which is amazing. If you fly often you could easily not appreciate the marvel of massive jets zooming across the sky. But its also really fucking lame. It takes a lot more crude Iraqi blood to make that refined jet fuel and just as with the auto industry, the true cost is hidden from us via a mountain of subsidies and deferments as the ecological toll will be paid by the next generation.

So, for our hyper-transportationally aware selves, flying, like consuming meat, should be done infrequently with great appreciation. Will there be another NYC screening in the future? Only the future will tell.  Take it all in while you can!

Possibly the last ever Bike Smut screening in New York City

Sunday, June 5
315 Ten Eyck Street

May 28, 2016

The bell tolls for Philly bikesexuals

Real Talk Philadelphia,

We have raced bikes, showed erotica, watched a car burn... all good times! But no matter how much love i profess for your pretzels, cheezsteaks and massive sculptures of the gates of hell (thx Rodin) I still feel daunted by your lack of brotherly love.

can ya feel the love now?

We have had some amazing times. Our 1st ever team went there in 2008, stranded, after your venue that was so excited to host us said a day before we were to arrive, "Oh, its porn! We can't show that... I thought it was bike porn, like ski porn" But on a whim we walked into a mosaic museum, debated paying the $3 and then noticed the subtle but frequent amount of sex and bike parts on display. A moment later I asked a person who looked like the janitor a couple questions and then he told us we should show our erotic bicycle films right there, that night, and sure enough there we were, in the bowels of Philadelphia's Magic Gardens watching our movies bounce of the glass walls making 1000 points of ‪#‎bikeporn‬ light.

Our last show was 2 years ago with the Porny Express. While Reverend Phil was in the midst of riding his bike from Minneapolis to Mexico the talented Reecy Pontiff sung about falling under the lofty charms of "The Girl on the Tallest Tallbike in Town" to the radical queers. Each year all of the people were beside themselves wanting to bring it back better "next year"

All have failed.

I do not accept the excuse of, "That's hare things are in ___ (name a place)" because they say that everywhere. Your eccentric people are just as unreliable as the next. But still you have a chance. This is the final screening of Bike Smut in Philadelphia. Maybe somehow history will stop repeating itself? Maybe you know someone. Then you could invite them with you to see the LAST EVER screening of Bike Smut in Philly!

As you may know, Bike Smut is in its 9th and FINAL year of touring. But before it is over we are taking a final shot at Philadelphia! It has been two years since Bike Smut: Bike Porn which means you will get to see the best of both our 8th and 9th year of programing!

  BEFORE THE SHOW we are putting together a special panel discussion to engage the sexual organ between your ears.


Friday June 3rd
Wooden Shoe Books and Records
704 South Street
7pm "Future of Sex" Panel Talk
8pm Show!
$7 donation (no one turned away for lack of funds)
Limited Seating, 18+

photo by qbarmatt

Or if not, maybe we will just go eat some pretzels. They are almost worth the suffering.

May 7, 2016

Working the Sausage in Nuremburg

If you search the Internet for "nuremberger" all you get is a sausage fest. Not dick pics, literally butchered meats in long, narrow enclosures. Fitting, because it seems probable that Bavaria invented partying while feasting on sausage and named it after a month in the Autumn (even tho they do it everyday). It doesn't matter if you order a hot dog in Hamburg or a Salisbury Steak in Frankfurt, these conventions do not apply. It might not make much sense to our New World food categorizations which tell us that while its true that both are cylinders of ground up animal parts one is a flat disk without a casing and the other is a long tube.

the end result of being a sausage around Miss Poppy Cox
Your complete awareness of this information is not required to watch Bike Smut this Sunday night at the Nürnberger Fahrrad-Film-Festvial. Still, Miss Poppy Cox wants to totally go all Bavarian with you! Enjoy a bright white sausage party with beer and pretzels and the world's finest collection of erotic bicycle films at the International Cycling Film Festival!

 Just listen to these efficient German verbiage:

Der Höhepunkt des 4NFFF: A Festival of Radical Pleasure!
Bei Bike Smut gibt es kurze, erotische Filme auf zwei Reifen.
Mehr verraten wir nicht vorher - wer Bike Smut erleben will, muss es erleben!

Nürnberg - Casablanca Theatre
Samstag, 7. Mai, 22:50 Uhr

Yeah! Yer damn right we Sprechen Sie Deutsch! Get your bike-fucking tickets online, now!

more info about this randy fahrrad film festival at the adorably named URL:

May 4, 2016

The Alpha and Omega of Porn

This is the end of bikesexual times. For the lord did say unto me, take heed, for I am the alpha and omega, the semination and termination of porn.

Bless the beasts and the bicycles; keep the Sabbath wholey

Saturday, May 7
Church of Fun

April 29, 2016

Last Ever Bike Smut in London!

 Miss Poppy Cox is the original Spokeslut 

in her own words
On the term, "Spokeslut" and how it was meant to shame me for my slutty nature. (I’m just some bimbo that is so brainwashed by the patriarchy that I cannot see how fucked up the image I created is.)
I thought I would write my own personal slut manifesto. A declaration of how I want to live my life. I thought it might provide some inspiration or at least clarification for the rest of you out there. So here it is:

I will have as much or as little sex as I want, with whomever I am mutually attracted to, regardless of race, adult age or gender identity. This will fluctuate throughout my life and I will not feel bad for having more sex or less sex than is usual for myself, or whatever amount society wants to deem is correct. In my sexual interactions, I will always strive to be honest, open, and fulfill my desires as well as my partners, regardless of if they last for many years or just a few minutes. I will not lie or feel shame about my desire to have sex with many people. I will express my sexuality in whatever way I feel fit for me at that point in time, whether it be femme, butch  or any of the rainbow of other shades. I accept that this is influenced by many things, including the patriarchy we live in, but not solely. I will use my voice and my actions to disrupt pre and misconceptions of that sexuality.  I will not fall into the duality of madonna or whore. I am a whole person with many facets. As a sexual being, many of those facets have to do with my sexuality, but it is not the only way I will be valued. 



Miss Poppy Cox hosts our last ever screening of Bike Smut in London.
@ Old St from 9pm (18s only)